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Materia: Geez you guys are still with us? You’re gluttons for punishment aren’t you. Anyways, here is Part 2 of the MSTing of FFIX, much to my consternation, my sister has actually brought coffee with her this time you have been warned, that’s all I’m saying.
Nightshade: Hey I’m not THAT bad…sorta, I think….whatever. Anyways Squaresoft owns FFIX…
Materia: Square Enix now actually…
Nightshade: Shows how long this as been on the back burner…anyway we don’t own it or anything else we care to mention.
Materia: Which will mainly be Star Trek, Futurama, The Simpsons and Red Dwarf, to their owners we are truly sorry…honest.
Nightshade: Yay flames heat my coffee. On with the show *swigs coffee* Weeee!
Materia: I warned you all…oh still PG-13 mainly because we’re twisted.
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[The screen switches to the crew of the completely wrecked theatre ship...]
Baku: Oww... My back's killin' me. Are you alright?
Nightshade: (as Baku’s back) I think I may be broken…
Cinna: Yeah, but the Prima Vista's wasted.
Materia: (as Cinna) Dibs on blaming Zidane!
Baku: Just our luck to crash in this forest... It's gonna get interesting...
Nightshade: Really? Interesting…You know what I doubt it.
Cinna: What do you mean, 'interesting,' Boss? I hear no one's ever made it outta here alive.
Nightshade: Ohhh I retract my previous statement.
Materia: Never? Heh, yay death, hopefully to all the protagonists.
Blank: Boss! There's fire everywhere! It's outta control!
Nightshade: (as Blank) Purple alert! Purple alert!
Materia: (as Baku) What's a purple alert?
Nightshade: (as Blank) Well, it's like not as bad as a red alert, but a bit worse than a blue alert -- sort of a mauve alert.
Baku: Quit yer whinin' and get it under control! And get the wounded outta here!
Nightshade: (as Baku) Including yourself I don’t care how many legs you have broken damnit!
Blank: Alright!
Materia: Heh sucks to be him, actually sucks to be the other wounded.
Baku: (to Cinna) Get our goods outta here, too: weapons, items, anything we can use! There's no way we can survive if all our stuff is toast.
Materia: (as Cinna) But toast is good for you…toast is good, you can survive on it. Plus everyone loves a good piece of toast.
Nightshade: (as Baku) Look, I don't want any toast, and he doesn't want any toast. In fact, no one around here wants any toast. Not now, not ever. No toast! Idiot!
Cinna: I'm on it!
Materia: (as Cinna) I knew I should have attempted that coup earlier, I so better get a pay rise after this!
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[Outside, Cinna is doing what Baku told him to do, putting all the goods in, an admittedly messy pile outside the Prima Vista wreckage] Cinna: Phew... I'm beat... Hurry up and put out the fire! I can't carry'em all by myself!
Materia: (as Cinna) Cause, y’know I’m short, fat, lazy and generally useless.
[Zenero carries a wounded musician out.]
Nightshade: (as musician) This never would’ve happened if you’d put on the Rocky Horror show, but no you had to listen to monkey boy…*faints*
Cinna: What the hell are they doin'!? The whole ship's gonna burn up!
Nightshade: Taking a break and playing cards?
Materia: Making a run for it? I know I would.
Zenero: They're lookin' for Garnet... Can't find her anywhere. Maybe she fell off... Got squashed under the ship.
Materia: (as Zenero) Just like the Wicked Witch in the Wizard of Oz, dibs on the ruby slippers.
Nightshade: (as Cinna) *whacks him with his hammer* Idiot….
Materia: ( as Zenero) There’s no place like home *faints*
Cinna: This is great. First we kidnap her, then we kill her. We'll hang for sure.
Materia: Yeah hang round with royalty, not like Brahne actually cares about her.
[Zidane arrives from the cliffs above the crash site.]
Cinna: Zidane, I'm surprised you made it! I can't believe you jumped off! You're nuts, you know that?
Nightshade: *sings* He believes he can fly, he believes he can touch the sky, he th…ouch.
Materia: *puts the stick away* Sing again and I’ll confiscate your coffee.
Nightshade: Noooo my precious *hugs coffee pot*
Zidane: I didn't jump off. I got thrown out from the impact. So, is everyone okay?
Materia: Yeah a likely story…idiot.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Except maybe Rusty, don’t care about him.
Cinna: Yeah. We've all got the devil's luck. But if we don't find Princess Garnet, we're all dead meat.
Nightshade: And wouldn’t Brahne dine well off of all of that meat, especially Baku.
Materia: Na he’s probably fat and gristle mostly.
[Zidane searches for Garnet in Evil Forest. Later, he sees Garnet held captive by a monster. Zidane runs up to see Steiner and Vivi are also there.]
Vivi: Sh-She's in trouble...
Nightshade: No really? Whatever gave you that idea?
[Vivi promptly stumbles uselessly to the ground]
Zidane: ...What the hell is that?
Materia: (as monster) I’m a mandragora type thingy if you must know….errr I mean rawr or something.
[Zidane sees the Prison Cage monster.]
Materia: As was already established, geez Shady you went all out on description didn’t you? Get lazy?
Nightshade: Well you could’ve helped but no you we to busy getting married and stuff. And yeah I did, what of it?
Materia: Oh yeah, heh…ok I’ll let you off.
Steiner: Release the princess at once!!!
Materia: (as Steiner) Or…or…I’ll scream like a little girl!
Nightshade: (as monster) Ahhh my one weakness, how did you know!
Zidane: Yeah, like it's gonna really listen to you. Come on!
Materia: (as Zidane) Lets set it on fire with my trusty matches *fumbles around* Errr I lost my trusty matches oh well hackage it is then.
[Zidane and Steiner fight the Prison Cage monster. After that, Prison Cage gets away with the unconscious Garnet.]
Nightshade: (as Vivi) Quick! Let's get out of here before they bring her back!
Steiner: Princess? PRINCESS!!!
Materia: This guy has less vocabulary that a 2 year old…
Zidane: What the heck? Where did they go?
Nightshade: Away from you? So a better place all around really.
Vivi: She's gone... I was too scared to cast any spells... That monster's probably gonna eat her...
Materia: With some fava beans and a nice Chianti?
Nightshade: Hey if a plant eats vegetables, does that make it a cannibal?
Materia: I dunno, probably, who cares?
Steiner: How could I let this happen!?
Nightshade: Yeah some stalker you are, you lost sight of her.
Zidane: Don't worry. She's not dead yet. That monster was only a minion. He's probably gonna take her to his master.
Materia: Oh yeah NO need to worry at all…dumbass
Steiner: That means the princess might still become! We must go find her at once!
Nightshade: Become what? A zombie?
Materia: Evil? No wait I think she already is.
Vivi: WHOA!!!
Materia: The openness of Steiner’s words shock and/or excite Vivi there.
[The Prison Cage monster came back and holds Vivi captive.]
Materia: OH NOES!!! *shock* NOT!
Zidane: !!!
Steiner: !!!
Nightshade: Real profound there guys, even Vivi managed a whoa at least.
[Zidane and Steiner fight the Prison Cage monster. Vivi tries casting Fire from the inside and it works against it.
Materia: Of course, Fire burns, its all so obvious now…duh.
After Zidane's group teams up, they defeat the Prison Cage monster, Vivi is released.]
Nightshade: Psh Vivi did all the hard work.
Vivi: Phew... Th-Thanks...
Materia: (as Vivi) For nothing, you guys suck!
Zidane: Are you alright?
Materia: (as Vivi) No thanks to you puny mortal!
Nightshade: You see evil tendencies in everyone don’t you?
Materia: Pretty much, except Zidane, he’s too stupid to be evil.
Vivi: Y-Yeah... I think so.
Nightshade: (as Vivi) As long as I have my hat I’m fine…my precious…
[The dying Prison Cage monster spews seeds at Vivi and Steiner.]
Materia: (as Steiner) Ewww icky monster vomit.
Vivi: !!!
Steiner: UGH!
Zidane: !!!
Nightshade: Yeah it was a nice surprise, imagine a monster having a final attack it could use…
Steiner: P-Prin...cess...
Materia: If he even utters that word one more time I’ll rip out his damn vocal cords.
[The Prison Cage monster dies.]
__________________________________________________
[Zidane carries Vivi and Steiner back to the theatre ship. The scene switches to Blank and Vivi in a bedroom.]
Nightshade: Hey up, what’s going on here?
Materia: Note to self; MSTing, Shady and coffee do not go well together.
Blank: You guys are lucky. If it weren't for Zidane, you'd both be dead. Some of the monsters in this forest reproduce by planting seeds in other animals. And when the seeds sprout, it's hasta la vista: you become beef jerky.
Materia: What is beef jerky anyway?
Nightshade: Smoked meat I think.
Materia: So smoked meat is made by evil plants reproducing in humans. Learn something new everyday.
Vivi: Um... A-Am I gonna die?
Materia: Hopefully, yeah.
Blank: No. You're gonna be fine. Here, drink this. It'll remove all the seeds from your body.
Materia: Godamn, well it better remove the seeds in a violent, painful manner then.
[Vivi drinks the medicine.]
Vivi: Ugh...eeyuck...
Nightshade: (as Vivi) Ewww this is Mountain Dew.
_______________________________________________________
[The screen switches to Steiner and Zenero walking up some stairs towards a room.]
Steiner: Princess... I'm coming right now...
Materia: He said the P word…urge to kill rising
Benero: ...Stand aside!
Benero got in Steiner's way.
Nightshade: He asks him to stand aside, then blocks him, I swear these Nero people are grade a idiots.
Benero: Room behind you. Go.
Materia: Another possible character slowly succumbing to Fujin syndrome.
Steiner: The princess... is in grave danger! Do you intend to ABANDON HER!?
Nightshade: (as Benero) Actually yeah, how’d you guess?
Benero: You're in no condition.
Materia: (as Benero) In fact I’m doubting you ever were. Was the captain job given to you for winning a pie eating contest or something?
Nightshade: (as Steiner) Ah, the truth comes out *cries*
Zenero: Don't worry about the princess. The boss'll think of something.
Nightshade: (as Zenero) Whenever he stops his latest sneezing fit, don’t hold hope on it ending soon.
[Benero pushes Steiner to a room and closes the door, locking it]
Steiner: Hey! Stop!
Materia: Ahhh brings back memories of high school, damn bullies.
Zenero: Get some rest.
Nightshade: (as Zenero) Actually get some exercise!
Benero: Yeah, and take that medicine I gave you.
Materia: No don’t, I’m sick of his whining!
[The screen switches to Steiner.]
Steiner: Dammit... I can't just stand here... The princess's life rests in my hands. What can their boss possibly accomplish!?
Materia: Anything you can do he can do better!
Nightshade: He can do anything better than you.
This medicine... It smells terrible. And the colour... This is obviously poison!
Nightshade: (as ominous voice) I'm not a god, I was misquoted.
Materia: As the days go by, we face the increasing inevitability that we are alone in a godless, uninhabited, hostile and meaningless universe. Still, you've got to laugh, haven't you?
[Steiner drinks the medicine.]
Steiner: Hey... Not bad.
Materia: (as Steiner) Tastes like Mountain Dew too…
_________________________________________________
[The screen switches to Zidane and Baku on the bridge] Baku: Forget it. Monsters born out of Mist are crawlin' everywhere.
Nightshade: (as Baku) Y’know mandragoras, fangs, imps, rabid fan girls…
Zidane: So what? There's nothing out there we can't handle.
Materia: (as Zidane) Except maybe the fan girls, but Rusty’d scare them off, hell he’d scare them all off.
Baku: Yeah, but what are we gonna do about the wounded?
Nightshade: (as Zidane) I thought you said you were gonna eat them?
Materia: (as Baku) Na there’s no Chianti on board…
Zidane: We can take 'em with us.
Materia: And what? Use them as distractions for monsters…hey that IS an idea actually.
Baku: How are we gonna carry all of them? Trust me. We go out now, and we'll all get wasted. My boys come before the princess, you know. It's too bad...
Materia: Damn foiled by logic…in a videogame? How unusual…
Nightshade: His boys…wow big family dude.
Zidane: !!!
Materia: More profound emotion from our lead character there.
Baku: We're gonna stay put 'til everyone recovers. You better not set one foot outside this ship. You got that!?
Materia: (as Baku) Or no Playstation for a month you hear me!
Zidane: I can't believe you're abandoning her! You're nothing but a big coward!
Materia: (as Zidane) Come on, what are you, a man or a munchkin?
Nightshade: (as Baku) I'm off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz.
__________________________________________________
[Zidane goes to Vivi's room.]
Materia: Don’t you say anything…
Nightshade: Wasn’t gonna…damn.
Vivi: Oh... Th-Thank you for helping me.
Materia: (as Vivi) But you’ll regret it later, oh yes you will.
Zidane: Ah, don't mention it. Besides, it was your black magic that saved the day. You know, you've got some major power for such a little guy.
Nightshade: (as Vivi) Hey I’m big for my age *sniff*
Vivi: ......
Materia: (as Vivi) Damn he’s on to me already!
Zidane: What's wrong...? Are you peeved at me because I called you little? Hey, you're a great mage with great powers, alright? To hell with looks. It's what's inside that counts.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) *cough*NOT*cough*
Materia: (as Vivi) First chance I get you are so flash fried!
Vivi: I'm sorry. When that monster caught her, I couldn't do anything...
Materia: (as Vivi) Actually no I’m not, I found your struggle with the plant quite hilarious, I made popcorn and everything…
Zidane: Hey, don't worry about the princess. I'll get her back. I promise.
Nightshade: Notice how he doesn’t say whether she’ll be alive or not.
Materia: Aw don’t get my hopes up…
Vivi: Thank you, Mr. Zidane.
Materia: (as Vivi) Heh that’s it build up trust now and stab him in the back later, mwhahaha.
Zidane: Whoa, that's the first time anyone's called me 'Mr.' Just call me Zidane, alright?
Nightshade: (as Zidane) What do I look like a teacher?
Materia: Dunno about him but you are…nutcase.
Nightshade:…shut up.
Vivi: Okay...Zidane.
Materia: (as Vivi) Hope I don’t have to keep this up too long…I feel ill. Damn knew I shouldn’t of had that second Mountain Dew!
[Zidane left Vivi's room. Zidane talks to himself.]
Nightshade: The first sign of madness!
Materia: Its not to hard to establish he’s mad you know, I mean just look at the crap he’s done so far in this part alone!
Nightshade: Oh yeah…
Zidane: Geez... He was pretty down... Maybe I shouldn't have made that promise. I don't even know if I'll be able to find her...
Nightshade: Yeah I mean there’s a whole *counts* 8 screens to check.
Materia: That took her 5 minutes people, a new record.
Nightshade: Shut up.
[The screen switches to the flashback of Zidane first meeting Garnet in Alexandria castle]
Zidane: Man... I never felt so strange... Maybe fate brought us together... I can't explain it...
Nightshade: And puberty’s onslaught starts suddenly for Zidane.
Materia: Heh puberty boy.
[The flashback ends]
Zidane: Man, I can't stop thinking about her... What am I gonna do...? (Go look for her.) Yeah! What's there to think about!? She's cute...and she's in trouble. That's all that matters.
Materia: Like the game would actually let you not go looking for her…damn thing.
Blank: ...There you are.
Nightshade: And Blank ignores Zidane and tries to go into Vi…ouch…ok, ok…
Materia: I love this stick *hugs it*
Nightshade: That’s mine though…
Materia: Hey share with your little sister!
[Blank arrives.]
Materia: So I hear
Blank: Why are you so serious? Uh-oh... What are you up to this time?
Nightshade: (as Blank) You’re not gonna drop cherry bombs in the boss’ medicine again are you?
Zidane: I'm gonna take that knight and the black mage to find the princess.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Cause apparently the boss is a munchkin…a very large, over-weight munchkin…
Blank: You're crazy! Man, you don't even know what's out there.
Materia: (as Blank) You’ll die the second you meet your first rabid fan girl…
Besides, there's no way the boss'll allow that.
Nightshade: (as Blank) He never allows anything…
Zidane: I know...
Materia: (as Zidane) I mean we deserved the pay rise, and the bar, and the playboy bunnies.
Blank: Sheez... Why do you always gotta play hero? The boss is gonna kill you. Well, what are you waiting for? Go talk to the boss.
Materia: Yeah so he can kill you, weee death at last. Well a girl can dream at any rate…
_______________________________________________________________
[Zidane goes to Baku's room.]
Nightshade: And sees some things that will scar him for the rest of his life.
Baku: (sleeping) AH! AAAH! AAACHOOO!!! (sneezing) Took you long enough... I fell asleep, darn it. So, you're leaving, eh?
Nightshade: (as Zidane) yeah, do I get a party?
Zidane: Yeah... I promised Garnet I'd kidnap her.
Materia: Which you are so failing at, I mean you’ve found her and lost her what at least 3 times!
Baku: Gwahaha! I didn't ask you why! I can't blame you, though. She's damn beautiful. I guess that's reason enough! Well, I hope you're ready! 'Cause I'm gonna bust you up for breakin' the rules.
Materia: He has rules? Rules? Where?
Nightshade: I think it’s just an excuse to beat his ass.
Materia: Oh…
Zidane: ...Alright.
Materia: Zidane must be a masochist or something.
Nightshade: Or a submissive…meh.
Baku: Okay, get your butt over to the cargo room. We got more room there.
Nightshade: (as Baku) Yeah so all the voyeurs…I mean boys can watch
[In the cargo room...]
Baku: You ready!?
Materia: (as Zidane) Can I take off the blindfold?
Zidane: Anytime!
Baku: I ain't holdin' back.
[Zidane fights Baku. After Zidane wins the fight...]
Materia: You know I’m pretty sure limbs don’t bend that way, thank God for the power of potions eh?
Baku: Alright, you win.
Nightshade: See just an excuse to beat him, evil bad father figure person
Baku: I'll be damned... Bravo!
Materia: (as Baku) You didn’t cry at all, you’re a big boy now.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Um yay?
[Baku punches Zidane.]
Materia: And Zidane drops faster than a red shirt on an away mission.
Baku: Go find your princess! Gwahahahaha...
[Baku leaves]
Zidane: Damn, that hurt! He pulled his punches 'til that last one.
Nightshade: ( as Zidane) Still I beat him, now just 10 more minutes ma *faints*
_______________________________________________________________________
[Zidane finds Steiner in his room, playing with a tatty doll, an image of Princess Garnet supposedly, that he found in the wreckage]
Steiner: .........
Materia: Geez he just can’t angst like Squall or Cloud, they look cool doing it, he is just pathetic.
Zidane: Come on. You're too old to be playing with a doll.
Nightshade: (as Steiner) Actually its an action figure so ner!
Steiner: Silence! A scoundrel like you could never understand! I'm just overwhelmed with concern for the princess!
Nightshade: What? Why? Cause she might find a stalker she actually likes?
If only you rogues hadn't kidnapped her...
Nightshade: Not that they did a fantastic job of that or anything…
This is all your fault! If anything should happen to the princess, I will have your head!
Materia: And Steiner is developing cannibalistic tendencies, just like that fat tubby Brahne.
Zidane: Take it easy. Geez... I'm gonna go look for her now. I'll let you come with me if you promise to be good. What do you say, Rusty?
Nightshade: (as Steiner) Fine, as long as I can bring the dolly…errr action figure with me.
Steiner: (pissed off) RR...RUSTY!!!? I am Adelbert Steiner, Captain of the Knights of Pluto, and I will never work with you conniving thieves!
Materia: (as Steiner) Cunning, devious, manipulative or shrewd thieves maybe, but never conniving ones like you!
Zidane: Captain? I figured you were a private, what's with that cheap, rusty armour... Look, this has nothing to do with Tantalus. It's something I decided to do on my own. I just wanna save Garnet.
Materia: Now you mention it is a little rusty? Do you reckon he ever even takes it off?
Nightshade: Don’t go there…
Steiner: Humph...! You had better not be lying! Because if you are, I won't hesitate to kill you!
Materia: (as Steiner) And devour you whole, just like I did in the pies in the pie-eating contest I participated in to get this jo….never mind.
Zidane: Yeah, yeah. I'm counting on you, Rusty.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) He’ll keep those rabid fan girls away, no one can possible love him…heh.
Steiner: Make no mistake. I'm going with you to rescue the princess! I will deal with you personally when this is over!
Nightshade: Deal with him, hey poker ^_^.
Materia: I seriously doubt he meant it like that…how much coffee have you had?
Nightshade: Only a few pots….why?
Materia: Oh Gawd…
Zidane: ...Whatever.
Nightshade: Zidane would probably just steal his armour and run off laughing anyway.
Steiner: It may be difficult with just two of us. We should seek Master Vivi's help as well.
Materia: Oh God! Vivi’s got to Steiner already…but Steiner likes Garnet, so the evil is one all, with the same servant/stalker. I just confused myself…
Zidane: Why are you calling him 'Master'?
Materia: (as Steiner) Because he is, you to will come to understand fear as I have, or you will perish!
Nightshade: Ohhh Eternal Darkness reference…nice.
Steiner: You fool. That black mage has unimaginable powers... I don't want to get him involved, but alas, it can't be helped. We need Master Vivi's powers to rescue the princess.
Nightshade: (as Steiner) Because as I learnt from Pokemon, fire beats grass.
Materia: See kids, videogames can be educational >.> <.< *takes notes*
Zidane: Alright, let's go talk to Vivi.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) He may come in handy, if only for roasting marshmallows.
____________________________________________________________________
[Zidane and Steiner find Vivi in the room he has been recovering in.]
Materia: And probably plotting evil things while he was at it.
Zidane: Well, Vivi, we're ready to go look for the princess.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Just let me check: thermos, sandwiches, corn plasters, telephone money, dandruff brush, animal footprint chart, and one triple thick condom... you never know!
Vivi: Really!? That's great! Be careful, okay?
Materia: (as Vivi) Though I doubt you’ll be needing most of those things, especially the condom.
Zidane: Actually, we want you to come with us, too.
Materia: (as Vivi) Aw hell no!
Vivi: Huh!? B-But I can't do anything.
Materia: (as Vivi) I can’t cast magic or nothing…honest, I’m worse than Cinna.
Steiner: Hardly, Master Vivi. Your magic was highly effective against that monster. In all honesty, I hold your power in greater than I do this scoundrel's.
Materia: (as Vivi) Nuts he remembered!
Vivi: B-But...I'm scared. I couldn't even move last time.
Materia: (as Vivi) Like I said, useless…geez leave me to my plotting already!
Steiner: Please, Master Vivi. For the sake of Princess Garnet and all of Alexandria, I humbly request your assistance!
Nightshade: (as Steiner) Pretty please, with a cherry on top?
Zidane: Come on! You're a black mage, for crying out loud! Show us what you got! Alright, let's get going.
Materia: (as Vivi) No? Really? What gave it away? The clothes? Or maybe the freaking MAGIC!
Vivi: ...Okay. I'll... try my best.
Materia: (as Vivi) To kill you before the day is out…
Steiner: Thank you, Master Vivi. Master Vivi...
Nightshade: (as Vivi) That’s right and don’t you forget it slave!
Vivi: Yeah?
Materia: (as Vivi) If it’s about a pay rise, slaves don’t get paid idiot!
Steiner: It's about your black magic. I wish to try an experiment. (I
was wondering if...)
Nightshade: (as Steiner) You could set Zidane on fire?
Materia: (as Steiner) If you could cook this meal for me?
Vivi: Magic sword...? Okay. I'll give it a try.
Materia: (as Vivi) As long as you use it to smite my enemies.
_________________________________________________________
[On their way out of the Prima Vista
Nightshade: They burned to death because the fire still hadn’t been put out?
Materia: Caught Baku’s cold and died a tragic, but hilarious death?
They meet up with Blank, leaning casually against a wall]
Materia: Trying to look cool, till he slips and falls flat on his face
Blank: Sheez... you really dig her, huh?
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Yeah I dig her….like a shovel.
Materia: (as Zidane) Yep, I dig her 6 feet under in fact.
Zidane: I can't sit around knowing a girl's in trouble. Goes against my nature.
Materia: (as Zidane) I don’t know why, you’d think we were in some generic videogame RPG or something.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) I seem to have as much interest in saving my own life as a chronically-depressed lemming.
Blank: Whatever. You're full of crap.
Nightshade: (as Blank) Yeah just look at all the crap you’re taking with you….footprint charts, brushes, wouldn’t potions and phoenix downs be better?
Zidane: Ohhh... I get it. You're jealous that I'm gonna get me a sweetie pie.
Nightshade: Or Tweetie pie….hey I think I just got the canary reference, they ripped it off Warner Bros.
Materia:…Oh yeah…XD
Blank: Pshhh... She's not even my type. I came down to give you this.
Materia: (as Blank) She has evil tendencies *shudders*
Nightshade: (as Blank) Here take this blonde wig and dress, it’s a disguise to help with the fan girl problem.
Zidane: You're always thinking about me...but I won't need a love potion to reel this one in.
Materia: (as Zidane) I got this bucket of worms right here for that.
Blank: Why don't you get your mind off girls for a second? This is the medicine I gave to that black mage and the knight. It's sort of like a seed remover.
Nightshade: (as Blank) It kinda also melts your innards a little, it is Mountain Dew after all…
Zidane: Cool. This'll really come in handy.
Materia: (as Zidane) I love Mountain Dew!
Blank: Why am I always helping you...?
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Um? Cause ya love me really?
Materia: (as Blank) Uh-oh he’s on to me.
[Zidane takes Blank's Medicine.]
Materia: He also took his wallet when he wasn’t looking.
Blank: Oh yeah. Here's a little tip from the boss.
Materia: Why don't you smegging-well smeg off, you annoying little smeggy smegging smegger!?
Nightshade: Remember, in an emergency situation involving two or more officers of equal rank, seniority will be granted to whichever officer can program a vcr.
[Zidane reads the letter Baku has written.
Materia: Wow he can read!
The letter says as follows:
Don't forget to set your abilities. Leaving the band is your business, but you better keep training!
Materia: After all as leader you never know if you have to boost morale by donning a dress and false boobs and perform an impromptu panto.
Learning more abilities is gonna make you even stronger.
Nightshade: (as Baku) Dame acting abilities are super effective against fan girls.
Good luck,
Nightshade: (as Baku) *coughNOTcough*
Baku
Zidane: Hey, Blank, how do you set abilities again?
Materia: (as Zidane) Also, how do you tie shoes? Oh and put your shirt on the right way around?
Blank: Man, how can you forget? It's so basic. Open the Menu, select Ability, select Equip, and choose the abilities you wanna set.
Nightshade: (as Blank) Don’t forget your Dame skill Zidane, that’ll definitely come in handy.
Zidane: Thanks Blank. I'll see you when I see you. Materia: Not if he sees you first.
Blank: How about never?
Materia: See I was right, yay!
__________________________________________________________________
[Zidane's group moves on. Once deep enough into the forest an FMV plays of the place being full of monster flowers.
Materia: Ohhh what a shock…
Zidane's group finally find Garnet being held captive by the big Mother Plant]
Nightshade: Who was trying to kill Garnet the best way it knows how, mothering her to death.
Materia: Oh the horror!
Vivi: There she is!
Materia: Wow keen eyesight there Vivi.
Zidane: So, this is the master.
Materia: (as Vivi) No godamn it, that’s me and don’t you forget it!
Nightshade: (as Zidane) As far as I can see it, we have two options: One, we take it on and kill it; or Two, run away. Who's for Two?
Steiner: Princess!!! You stay out of this!
Nightshade: (as Garnet) Ok *sits down with popcorn*
Alexandria would be disgraced if a mere bandit should rescue the princess.
Materia: (as Zidane) I’m no mere bandit, I’m super bandit!
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Capable of thieving the underpants from under your armour…not that I’d wanna…
Zidane: You think you can handle him on your own?
Materia: Nice going calling ‘him’ a mother plant there Shady.
Nightshade: Plants have both reproductive sets required to reproduce so it doesn’t matter anyway! Where were you in science?
Materia: At the back, goofing off and trying to blow stuff up.
Steiner: ......
Zidane: Let's get him, Vivi!
Nightshade: (as Vivi) Mmm plant monster stir-fry…ok I’m in.
[Zidane's group fights the Mother Plant. At a certain point, Blank joins the fight and they all team up and eventually defeat the Mother Plant]
Nightshade: Wow, Blank made it past the fan girls!
Materia: He has the power…skills, abilities whatever.
Steiner: Princess!!! Please get a hold of yourself!
Nightshade: (as Garnet) Ok *holds self* And this accomplishes what exactly?
Blank: Zidane, give her the stuff.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Sorry Steiner already drank it…
Materia: (as Blank) Wow and his insides didn’t melt? Amazing.
[Zidane gives Garnet Blank's Medicine.]
Garnet: Urgh...
Nightshade: (as Garnet) Mountain Dew, what are you trying to do kill me?
Materia: Well that would be nice…
Steiner: Princess, please try to drink all of it.
Nightshade: (as Steiner) I’ll get withdrawal symptoms, but it’ll be easier to quit when there’s none left.
Vivi: Is she gonna be okay?
Materia: Well I hope not…neither does he probably.
[Suddenly, the ground begins shaking.]
Materia: Wow Baku must of let a real big one lose there!
Blank: Oh, man! What now!?
Nightshade: Err an earthquake?
Materia: The God Titan decided he hates you all?
[A large hole appears in the ground where the Mother Plant once was and Plant Spiders pop out.]
Materia: Plant spiders…eww I hate spiders.
Nightshade: Wimp.
Blank: Sheez! We're gonna be surrounded!
Nightshade: And they run faster than Materia away from a tarantula.
Materia: Hey no making fun of me!
Zidane: Let's get out of here!
Materia: I agree *hides*
Blank: GO! (to Vivi) What are you waitin' for!?
Nightshade: (as Vivi) I was kinda hoping the slave or Zidane would faint like a girl but meh.
[Zidane's group are chased by Plant Spiders through the forest.
Materia: (as everyone) Ewww *girly scream*
Zidane suddenly stops]
Nightshade: And realises they’re only a few inches tall and squishes them good.
Blank: What are you doin'!?
Materia: (as Blank) Run Zidane RUN!
Zidane: Something's wrong...
Nightshade: What? Can you feel it in the force?
Blank: What?
Materia: (as Blank) Oh…we left the oven on! Now we won’t save 20% on our energy bill.
Zidane: The entire forest is coming after us. Blank... Take care of everyone.
Materia: Why? You gonna get yourself killed? Oh please...
Blank: (What did he mean by that?)
Nightshade: Probably bugger all.
Materia: Coming from Zidane, I agree.
[FMV All the crew are running, a Plant Spider nearly catches Zidane
Materia: Damn so close…
But at the last second Blank pushes Zidane forward and Blank is caught instead. The forest started to petrify and Blank throws a map to Zidane. Zidane manages to catch it and just about manages to escape, but Blank is petrified.]
Nightshade: (as Vivi) All in all, 100% successful trip.
Materia: (as Steiner) But sir, we lost Mr Blank.
Nightshade: (as Vivi) All in all, 100% successful trip.
Zidane: Dammit!!! That idiot! Blank...
Materia: (as Zidane) He owed me 10 gil!
________________________________________________________________________
[Zidane’s group camp just outside the now completely petrified forest]
Nightshade: I’d be completely petrified by those idiots too.
Vivi: I hope she gets well soon...
Materia: I don’t
Steiner: This is all his fault! (to Zidane) Have you nothing to say, you filth!?
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Yeah I do…Your pants have fallen down.
Materia: (as Zidane) Yeah, kindly cluck off, before I extract your giblets, and shove a large seasoned onion between the lips you never kiss with.
Garnet: ...Oh...
Nightshade: (as Garnet) I could just go for a chicken right now.
[Garnet wakes up.]
Materia: (as Garnet) Oh it wasn’t a nightmare, I’m still surrounded by idiots.
Steiner: P-Princess!!!
Materia: And the P word is back, probably to stay.
Garnet: ...Steiner? ...How did I survive...? You brought me here?
Materia: She’s obviously delusional, she’s being nice to the annoying stalker dude.
Steiner: It is my sworn duty to protect you at any cost.
Nightshade: Get real man. Most eunuchs have got more balls than you.
Zidane: What are you talking about? It was Vivi's magic and my dagger that got you out of there, Princess.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Oh and Blank, but who cares about him.
Garnet: I thank you both.
Materia: (as Garnet) I can now continue my plans for world domination mwahaha.
Steiner: That monkey deserves no praise! None of this would've happened if you and your band hadn't abducted the princess!
Materia: Great job by the way guys, kidnappers everywhere salute you!
And how dare you claim that you have rescued her!? When we get back to Alexandria, I will-
Materia: Eat him?
Nightshade: Have him hung, drawn, quartered, then eat him?
Materia: You just have to go one better…
Garnet: I left the castle of my own will.
Materia: (as Garnet) I mean there were no toilets for starters, speaking of which I could still really use that pee…
Zidane: What a coincidence, eh? We went to snatch her, and she wanted to be snatched.
Nightshade: Although basically she kidnapped herself cause you did bugger all really.
Steiner: Impossible!
Materia: Yeah why would she ever want to part company with her obviously delightful mother and yourself?
Garnet: It's true.
Nightshade: (as Garnet) You mean you’ve never noticed there were no toilets.
Materia: (as Steiner) Err I kind of thought that’s what the fountain was for…
Zidane: So what do you say, Rusty? Friends? Come on, let's just enjoy this camping trip while it lasts.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Come on…I’ve got marshmallows.
Steiner: Camping-you imbecile! Surely you even you must know something about the Mist. The vicious monsters it spawns! The abnormalities it stirs in the mind and body! Princess, we must leave this dangerous place at once.
Materia: (as Steiner) Fan girls are super effective against other girls.
Zidane: You've gotta be kidding. She hasn't fully recovered yet.
Materia: (as Zidane) Yeah the mountain dew still hasn’t stopped melting her innards yet…
Steiner: Silence! Who asked for your opinion!?
Nightshade: Err he did? I guess…
Zidane: Alright, tell me... How do you plan to get out of here? We're standing in a valley surrounded by cliffs. And last I heard, North Gate and South Gate were sealed off.
Materia: (as Zidane) Because apparently some mastermind was smuggling large amounts of the drug sleeping weed into Alexandria.
Nightshade: (as Garnet) The fiend! *shifty eyes*
Steiner: .........
Nightshade: …………….ha I can say nothing too!
Zidane: Yeah. That's what I thought.
Materia: (as Zidane) *points accusingly at Steiner* It was you wasn’t it!?
Steiner: Grrrrr...
Nightshade: (as Steiner) I know nothing, I’m from Barcelona.
Materia: And I would havegotten away with it too if it wasn't for you and your pesky mage!
Zidane: The princess can barely walk right now. You went through this. You should know. I think we should rest for now.
Steiner: I will never follow your-
Nightshade: (as Steiner) Words of advice because I’m too much of a stubborn dumbass.
Zidane: Steiner!!! State your sworn duty!
Materia: (as Steiner) To feed Queen Brahne at the cost of my own life.
Steiner: What else!? To protect Princess Garnet Til Alexandros!
Nightshade: And the foot goes into the mouth. Now Steiner has to effectively follow the advice/orders of 3 people.
Materia: One of which is an idiot…more fool him.
...Very well. Until the princess recovers, I will guard this place with my life.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) You? You'd sacrifice your life for the good of the crew?
Materia: (as Steiner) No! I'd sacrifice your life for the good of the crew.
Zidane: Sounds good to me. Vivi, let's get some rest.
Nightshade: Yeah, no need to worry about those fan girls now.
__________________________________________________________________________
[The next morning outside the petrified forest, Zidane and Garnet talk...]
Zidane: How are you feeling?
Materia: (as Garnet) Ready to take over the world. (as herself) Though I’d much prefer it if she snuffed it.
Nightshade: Man you really hate the characters don’t you.
Materia: No I hate you for convincing me this was a good idea.
Garnet: Good...thanks to that medicine you gave me. Could this be...?
Materia: (As Garnet) Completely impenetrable by any chance. I’ll need something like that for my fortress.
Zidane: Yeah, I was surprised too. After we beat that big plant-guy, the forest got completely petrified.
Nightshade: Yeah it was all your fault for being an idiot though I reckon.
Garnet: Vivi told me that we were able to escape because of your friend.
Materia: (as Garnet) Not that I care or anything…
Zidane: ...His name is Blank.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) I think…I don’t really care either.
Garnet: We must go help him.
Materia: (as Garnet) He actually sounds useful unlike the rest of you imbeciles.
Zidane: We can't do anything for him right now.
Materia: Why? Cause he’s too stoned?
Nightshade: The forest was made of drugs?
Garnet: But...I can't-
Materia: (as Garnet) Go on without him…honest *shifty eyes*
Zidane: We'll come back for him. I'm sure there's a way to cure him. Let's get going. According to the map that Blank gave me, there's a cavern to the south of us. Maybe we can get above the Mist through that cavern. Are you alright? Everything's gonna be fine. Trust me.
Materia: Trust him? The guy who failed miserably at kidnapping her and almost got her killed? *laughs*
_______________________________________________________________
[Later, as they are about to leave camp, a moogle arrives]
Materia: Aw Gawd not again!
Vivi: Look! There's something coming!
Nightshade: Vivi is so perceptive.
Materia: Wasn’t Steiner supposed to be on lookout?
Monty: Wait! Kupo! I'm impressed, Kupo! First time I've seen anyone escape from Evil Forest. You all must be strong, kupo! But don't get cocky, kupo. Lots of stronger monsters ahead. Before you go out to the world, Mogster will teach you a few things.
Materia: Oh no you don’t *presses fast forward*
[After Zidane's group learned all the basic survival stuff...]
Materia: Hey, reckon you can fast forward the entire thing?
Nightshade: Even if you could, I wouldn’t let you.
Materia: Spoilsport…
Monty: I have a gift for you, kupo. Take this flute.
Nightshade: (as Monty) One of you is a bard right?
Materia: (as everyone) Why the hell would we want a spoony bard!?
[Zidane received Moogle's Flute.]
Materia: (as Zidane) Whooptie do
Monty: With this flute, you can call us anywhere in the world, kupo. Press ? to play it. Happy trails! Kupo!
Materia: (as Zidane) You what? *smashes it* There no more moogles.
Garnet: Thank you.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) You’re very welcome.
Monty: Kupopo!
Nightshade: Translation: Nooooo *fades from existence*
Materia: Yay! Party!
Vivi: Bye!
Nightshade: So everyone is in agreement.
Monty: Kupoo!
Materia: Translation: Bastards!
[Zidane slaps Steiner to get his attention that Zidane's group is moving on. He’d been asleep the whole time]
Materia: Must have been all the Mountain Dew.
Nightshade: Wouldn’t that keep a normal person awake?
Materia: Since when was Steiner normal?
Steiner: !!! What the... Who goes there!?
Materia: Well no one now…
Monty: Your friends already left, kupo.
Materia: (as Steiner) Ahh Moogle ghost!
Steiner: Princess, wait!
Materia: (as Steiner) You’re the only addiction I had left!
___________________________________________________________
[Zidane's group, now Steiner has joined them proceeds to Ice Cavern.
Nightshade: Nice original dungeony name there
Near the entrance...]
Zidane: This must be the cavern...
Nightshade: What made you notice? I bet it was the ice wasn’t it, dead give away.
Vivi: U-Um...
Zidane: What's up, Vivi?
Nightshade: (as Zidane in condescending voice) Do you need to potty?
Materia: (as Vivi) Why haven’t I killed you yet?
Vivi: Have you ever heard of the Ice Cavern?
Materia: (as Zidane) Oh-Oh I know this one…
Zidane: Sure... Is this the place?
Materia: So the ice didn’t give it away then?
Vivi: I think so... It's supposed to be near the Evil Forest.
Nightshade: Geez even Vivi didn’t notice…
Garnet: ...I've heard of it. It's supposed to be a beautiful place, covered in ice.
Materia: It’s official they are all idiots.
Vivi: My grandpa told me about this place. He said the cavern takes travellers to the top of the Mist.
Materia: And their impending doom? Please, lets have some doom.
Nightshade: (as Vivi) Better hope you’re wearing your thermals though, I know I am!
Steiner: Bravo! Master Vivi's grandfather must be quite a scholar! We must thank him upon escaping the Mist!
Nightshade: Vivi’s grandfather is an idiot, letting a kid go to Alexandria to see a play all by himself, and with a fake ticket no less!
Vivi: My grandpa used to teach me lots of things, but he passed away...
Materia: (as Vivi) Mainly cause I roasted him but that’s besides the point eheh…
Steiner: Oh... Forgive my indiscretion.
Materia: (as Steiner) Please don’t kill me master.
Nightshade: (as Vivi) You shall succumb to the horrors of oblivion!…Later when I can be bothered.
Vivi: Don't worry about it.
Materia: (as Vivi) He tasted nice.
Nightshade: Geez you think everyone’s an evil cannibal.
Zidane: Well...why don't we go inside?
Nightshade: Yeah you might as well freeze to death now and get it over with.
Materia: Oh please do!
[Just Inside...]
Garnet: Oh...! What a beautiful place! Seeing the actual cavern is so much better than reading about it!
Materia: Gotta see it to believe it!
Oh, how pretty... I wonder what kind of flower this is?
Materia: (as Garnet) And I wonder if it’s poisonous, I could kill them all mwhaha!
Steiner: Princess! Please, don't touch anything!
Nightshade: (as Steiner) You should be holding me…
Materia: Let’s not go there…geez look at what 7 pots of coffee does to you!
Nightshade: *hands head shamefully* I really need to pee too.
Materia: Not until this is finished you’re not!
Zidane: Can we get moving? I'm freezin' here.
Materia: (as Garnet) Then do it quietly!
_________________________________________________________________
[Zidane's group moves on. Eventually they come to an area where a large blizzard is blowing]
Materia: Bet they wish they’d packed their thermals now!
Zidane: Vivi, hurry up, or you'll left behind!
Materia: Vivi slows down figuring this would actually INCREASE his survival chances.
Vivi: I...I'm coming.
Nightshade: (as Vivi) Slowly, very slowly, but I’m coming.
Garnet: Oh no!
Materia: (as Garnet) He’s still with us!
[Vivi collapses suddenly.]
Materia: The idiocy finally got to him
Steiner: Master Vivi! Are you okay?
[Steiner collapses too.]
Nightshade: Out of sympathy?
Materia: Because they are inexplicably linked by fate?
Zidane: Yo, Rusty! You're...not alright, are you? What happened to you guys? Hey, Rusty! Move it or lose it! Get up!
Nightshade: Completely ignoring poor Vivi who becomes an icicle in the meantime.
Materia: He’s worse than that Richard Simmonds guy at motivating people.
[Zidane kicks Steiner.]
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Ow…I stubbed my toe.
Materia: Oh yep, very motivational.
Zidane: It's no use.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) This is getting like that film Alive! I might have to eat them to survive.
Materia: And you said I was obsessed with cannibalism!
[Garnet collapses]
Nightshade: Seems no one can stand to go on with Zidane.
Materia: Does this mean they’re dead and we can go?
Nightshade: This is a Final Fantasy game, of course not!
Zidane: Oh no! Garnet! Not you, too? Garnet? She's out cold... Shoot... I'm falling asleep...
[Zidane collapses as well]
Nightshade: (as Zidane) I’m bored zzz.
Materia: Nice place to take a nap.
[A bell sounds that wakes Zidane up]
Materia: (as Zidane) Aww man late for school again!
Zidane: What's that sound...? It came from over there... Is somebody there...?
Materia: No it’s just your imagination…
[Zidane approaches the area where the sound came from.]
???: Why didn't you fall asleep?
Materia: (as ???) God damn useless, sucky status inducing spells!
[An enemy appears from above]
Nightshade: Typical bad guy entrance, can’t they do something original…
Black Waltz No. 1: You should be dead by now...
Materia: Gawd I’ve lost count of the times he should be dead man!
Zidane: Are you the one causing this blizzard?
Nightshade: Gee, bad guy who is obviously a mage, cause a blizzard? Never!
Black Waltz No. 1: Hee-hee-hee... That's right!
Materia: (as Black Waltz) Tell the guy what he’s won.
Nightshade: Zidane Tribal you’ve won…a boss battle!
Materia: (as Zidane) Wow cool!
[Zidane fights Black Waltz and Sealion. After Zidane defeats them...]
Materia: He dances on their graves?
Nightshade: Gets 1500 gill and some dagger for himself.
Materia: That is what he gets isn’t it?
Nightshade: Yep.
Mysterious Voice: You defeated No. 1, but No. 2 and No. 3 will reclaim the princess!
Nightshade: (as mysterious voice) And if they don’t? Well I’ll lose my job I guess…
Zidane: Wh-Who's there? Oh, whatever... I've gotta go back and check on them!
Materia: Are they dead? Please?
___________________________________________________________________
[The group is recovering just as Zidane reaches them]
Materia: Well poop!
Garnet: Zidane!
Nightshade: (as Garnet) Where did you go stupid meat shield?
Materia: (as Garnet) Why aren’t you dead?
Zidane: Hey, there. Everybody okay?
Materia: (as Steiner) A little frostbite, but meh.
Steiner: You! What just happened?
Zidane: It was no big deal.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Beat up some guy, robbed your wallet while you were unconscious, considered eating you, no big.
Steiner: You're hiding something!
Nightshade: Yeah, your wallet.
Materia: And most of your other personal items.
Zidane: Hey, nothing happened. You heard me.
Steiner: You...didn't touch the princess, did you?
Materia: (as Steiner) Only I may touch the princess!
Nightshade: (as Garnet) No you may not. God I need that court order so bad!
Zidane: Just what are you accusing me of?
Nightshade: Being a perv basically.
Garnet: Steiner, he said nothing happened. Why are you being so rude?
Materia: (as Garnet) You know that only I may be rude to the peasants!
Steiner: ...My apologies, Princess.
Garnet: Well, I'm glad everyone is safe. Shall we move on? Zidane? Is something bothering you?
Materia: (as Zidane) Yeah, why do kids love cinnamon crunch toast?
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Where do kids come from?
Zidane: No... It's nothing.
_______________________________________________________________
[Zidane's group moves on. They eventually reach the outside of the Ice Cavern...]
Garnet: We made it through the Mist! Oh, the sun feels great!
Materia: Yeah, that’s what they all say, till they get skin cancer.
Nightshade: Remember kids sun block is your friend.
Zidane: Look, there's a village. I think I've been there before...
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Back when I first started out as an actor, my drag act bombed there…stupid village.
Garnet: It sounds like you've been everywhere, Zidane. The only other worlds I've visited are in books.
Materia: Nerd!
You may have been to that village. Let's go visit.
Nightshade: (as Garnet) Heh, I want to hear how badly you bombed!
Zidane: Wait. Hold it.
Materia (as Zidane) You must never mention the drag act! Ever!
You're a princess! You can't just go rushing in there. People are looking for you. You need a new identity.
Nightshade: (as Zidane) You can be Robin Spitz
Nightshade: (as Zidane) Maiden name Swallows
[Steiner gets angry and pushed Zidane. Zidane recovers just before he falls off the cliff and he drops his dagger.]
Materia: Aw so close again…
Nightshade: (as Steiner) How dare you even suggest the Princess would marry someone with a surname like that!
Steiner: Insolent fool! The princess need not sneak around! Besides, we're heading back to the castle. You leave her alone. And you will address her as 'Princess' from now on, you silly peasant!
Nightshade: I thought he was a bandit?
Materia: Or a conniving thief?
Zidane: Dammit, Rusty! Why don't you shut up? Who do you think you are? I don't take orders from a stuck-up jerk like you!
Materia: Yeah he only takes orders from overweight munchkins!
Vivi: You guys!
Materia: (as Vivi)…are idiots, you know that right?
Garnet: Stop it, you two! ...Steiner, I do not intend to return to the castle.
Nightshade: (as Garnet) At least not until they get adequate toilet facilities!
And I do see Zidane's point. I need a new name... (picks up Zidane's dagger) Zidane... What is this called?
Materia: See, sharp, pointy objects fascinate her, she’s evil!
Zidane: That? That's a dagger. All knives of that length are called daggers. Short swords are a bit longer. The big sword you hold with both hands is called a broadsword. And...
Nightshade: (as Zidane) See how much I know about weapons, I are smart!
Garnet: Oh, okay... I understand now. So this is called a 'dagger'...
Materia: Yes, I believe he covered that in his summary.
Steiner: Princess! It's a weapon! Please be careful.
Nightshade: Why? She might stab you, and that’d be a good thing.
Garnet: I've decided! From now on, my name is... Dagger. I will be called Dagger from now on. What do you think, Zidane?
Nightshade: I dunno about Zidane but I think its dumb.
Materia: Garnet has been infected with stupid!
Zidane: Is that okay with you?
Garnet: (Yes.)
Materia: Obviously, cause y’know, she suggested it.
Zidane: Great, Dagger. Now, let's work on your speech... Try to sound more casual. Like me.
Nightshade: Why would anyone want to sound like a conniving thief and failed kidnapper/playwright?
Materia: Beats me.
Dagger: I shall try.
Nightshade: (as Dagger)…my best not too.
Zidane: No, no, no... (What would Vivi say...?)
Nightshade: Die puny mortal?
Materia: You stupid idiot?
Vivi: ?
Materia: (as Vivi) Don’t know myself.
Zidane: Just say... 'Alrighty.'
Dagger: A-Alrighty!
Nightshade: Poor Garnet…I mean Dagger, lost in the realm of stupidity forevermore.
Materia: So much for world domination.
Zidane: You're getting the hang of it! Well... Let's go.
Materia: (as Zidane) To our impending doom again!
Nightshade: And off to the toilet I go *runs*
And Part 2 done. Next we shall try to get through to Lindblum or there abouts anyway. Please note we’re not MSTing all the ATE that happen in the game, we couldn’t script them all for one, and this’ll be long enough as it is XD. Remember, comments etc can be sent to espios_sis@hotmail.com
Laters
Nightshade and Materia